Just for Fun Friday Funnies - March 28, 2025 Edition

lynnmosher said:
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It so happens I'm wearing an analog watch right now... I guess we get to use cursive as a secret code now?
 
cleaning out my email and found more...

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1000 Points to Get Into Heaven
A man dies and goes to heaven when Peter meets him at the Pearly Gates. Peter says, “You need 1000 points to make it into heaven. You tell me all of the good things you’ve done, and I give you a certain number of points for each item. When you reach 1000 points, you get in.” “Okay,” the man says, “I was happily married to the same woman for fifty years and never cheated on her, not even in my mind.” “That’s wonderful,” says Peter, “that’s worth two points!” “Two points?” he says. “Well, I attended church all my life and gave my ten percent tithe faithfully.” “Terrific!” says Peter. “That’s definitely worth a point.” “One point? My goodness! Well, what about this: I started a soup kitchen in my city and worked in a shelter for the homeless?” “Fantastic, that’s good for two more points,” he says. “TWO POINTS!” the man cries. “At this rate the only way I can get into heaven is by the grace of God!” “Now that’s what we’re looking for! Come on in!”

How Many Christians Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb?
Charismatic: Only 1 - Hands are already in the air. Pentecostal: 10 - One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness. Presbyterians: None - Lights will go on and off at predestined times. Roman Catholic: None - Candles only. (Of guaranteed origin of course.) Baptists: At least 15 - One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken. Episcopalians: 3 - One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the old one was. Mormons: 5 - One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it. Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence. Methodists: Undetermined - Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass. Nazarene: 6 - One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy. Lutherans: None - Lutherans don't believe in change. Amish: What’s a light bulb?
 
Lynae Fisher said:
It so happens I'm wearing an analog watch right now... I guess we get to use cursive as a secret code now?
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Cursive is absolutely a secret code, now. Just today, I was test-driving a new car, looking to replace my 2008 Civic, and am resigning myself to the likelihood that I'll probably be having to give up my very effective anti-auto theft device (otherwise known as a stick shift...😔)
 
Wes B said:
Cursive is absolutely a secret code, now. Just today, I was test-driving a new car, looking to replace my 2008 Civic, and am resigning myself to the likelihood that I'll probably be having to give up my very effective anti-auto theft device (otherwise known as a stick shift...😔)
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Stick-shifts are still around, but yes, you'll probably be stuck with a little older vehicle. Much to my surprise, I recently found out that jeep wrangler has model with a manual transmission that is only around 10-15 years old, but that is still a bit too old for some people's liking. If you like being the mechanic, older has its advantages. One pro that I see with the manual transmission is that it ought to be easier to tow-start if the battery dies... Theoretically anyway.
 
Wes B said:
Just today, I was test-driving a new car, looking to replace my 2008 Civic, and am resigning myself to the likelihood that I'll probably be having to give up my very effective anti-auto theft device (otherwise known as a stick shift...😔)
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LOL Absolutely! The thieves don't know how to drive a stick shift! 😅
 
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