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Need a few short story critiques


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I was inspired by @carolinamtne the other day when she told me to read Of Mice and Men. I wrote a short story that I don't really have any aspirations of publishing just now, but I'd love to polish it some more in case I find somewhere that it might be a good fit. I call it a dramedy because it's a bit of a tongue in cheek portrayal of a mouse hunt. It does not have any Christian elements, but it is totally clean and does not contain romance (thought I'd throw that out there since I'm typically a romance writer). If you would be upset by depictions of mice dying in a trap, you should not read it.


Story is about 1600 words. If you would like to have a read, let me know and I'll send it to you in a message. Thanks all!

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10 minutes ago, carolinamtne said:

Is it inspired by the book you read?

It is actually inspired by the title. It's been a few years since I read the book. I've been sick for like the last week and a half, so I haven't been able to get to the library or anything.

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