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Betrayal of Love


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This poem is about a time very long ago. When a naïve young man married someone who turned out to be manipulative and selfish. After four years, it ended in divorce and was one of the worst times of my life. Here is how it ended, and what happened next.

 

Married for a couple of years, never happy and full of tears.
Vows made, what could I do? Just had to keep pushing through.

 

It was tragic; I didn't know the day she wanted me to go.
I had done nothing wrong; I wondered where it all came from.

 

It happened out of nowhere; I was off my guard, so unaware.
She said it was a big mistake, and now she needed a break.

 

Length of time, I didn't know. She wasn't being honest, though.
I Wasn't expecting her denial, she really wanted it more final.

 

Unexpected, completely shocked, my foundations were all rocked.
New Facebook status to enforce. She actually wanted a divorce.

 

Unspeakable pain held me down, I feared that I would drown.
Under the weight of despair, it's way too much for me to bare.

 

Now I can't get off the bed, too many questions in my head.
nothing but heartbreak and woe, pain and loneliness grow.

 

To Sleep through the night is rare, Losing hope, I no longer care.
Exhausted and no energy at all, I cannot walk, I can only crawl.

 

Fallen into great despair. I have lost myself in there.
Destroyed and torn apart, broken pieces of my heart.

 

I am destroyed and mangled, all my feelings tangled.
My memories shattered. Now nothing else matters.

 

Despite that life is persisting, I am only just existing.
Brief fragments of the past glimpsed in my mind so fast.

 

Plunging me into the depths, hard for me to take a breath.
Will this awful brokenness end? Can my heart fully mend?

 

Dark times with no future, my poor soul  needs a suture.
There is no way to rise above this life so void of love.

 

Months pass, it's all the same. Guilt, misery and shame.
Maybe one day I will be free from trauma that haunts me.

 

Now so much time has passed, will I find some rest at last.
It's darkest before the dawn, where I am tortured and torn.

 

By the good life that was broke, by the painful heavy yoke.
But now in darkness there is light, speaks end to my night.

 

I was at the end of my rope, but you shine a light of hope.
The healing starts anew, for a heart that's broken in two.

 

Desperate, praying to be heard, look for help in your word.
House is empty when I'm home, whole ordeal, I felt alone.

 

Escaping the valley of death, I can finally take a breath.
Healing from the outside in, it's not of me but from Him.

 

Was God there at the start, protecting my fragile heart?
It turns out; I was wrong, for He was with me all along.

 

You lifted me, called my name, removed grief and shame.
Fixing the broken pieces of me, you restored my identity.

 

Keeping me away from harm, you carried me in your arms.
Healing power from above, showered with mercy and love.

 

Restored, I'm ready for life. Keep me from trouble and strife.
Life transformed, start again. But this time I will focus on Him.

Edited by Amosathar
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