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1. How do Baptist burials and funerals work? I've looked online for answers, and a lot of it was helpful; however, I just don't know exactly how a burial commences. Funeral advice would help, too. I think the last funeral I attended that I remember was when I was somewhere in my older childhood years. Obviously, I don't remember all of what happened.

2. What normally happens after the funeral and burial? Do they have a sort-of thing where those who come to pay their respects and the family eat afterwards or something along those lines? (Again, I ask that because the first funeral I went to did that.)

3. How long does a visitation last? Also, what's the setup before a visitation?

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I don't know that it's any different from any other denomination.

 

*Visitation can be over a couple of days (a few hours twice a day) or all in one day (a couple of hours before the service). It depends on what the family. wants.

*If visitation is one day, sometimes food will be provided for the family.

*Many people put up boards with pictures of the person's life. The funeral of my sister-in-law had the photos on a tv that rotated. The pictures, not the tv.

*The service itself is what the family decides on. Hymns/songs. Piano music or other. Some give out printed material for everyone to follow. Some schedule a few people to speak; some don't. The preacher (or whoever is conducting the ceremony) will ask if anyone would like to say a few words. The preacher reads scripture and speaks about the person's life. The family files out first. Then the others.

*Everyone (those who want to) will go to the gravesite where the preacher will say a few words. This service only lasts a short while. Less than half an hour usually.

*Many times, everyone will then gather at someone's home to reminisce about the person and food is served.

*The funeral can be at the funeral home or at a church. Depending on the size of the funeral home and how well-known the person was (in anticipation of a large crowd).

That's all I can think of at the moment. Hope this helps.

 

 

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If the person was a member of a church, the church would probably provide the meal after the burial.

 

Some pastors speak mostly about the deceased during the service. Others use that opportunity to "reach the unreached," those who probably don't go to church except for a wedding or a funeral. Some do a combination.

 

Funerals vary as much as pastors do, but not all funerals are conducted by pastors in a church. And some folks just have a graveside service, either with a pastor or with someone else. (There is no law in most states that says it has to be a pastor.)

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I attended a Baptist Funeral two years ago. Modern technology has made itself felt even there.

 

There were two wakes at the funeral home - Friday evening and Saturday morning. The close family members stood in a receiving line near the open casket. During one of them, a minister or staff member of the funeral home (I forget) read scripture and led the people in prayer. Some family and friends said a few words of remembrance. A computer monitor went through a loop showing pictures supplied by the family. The funeral home had a permament online website for people to leave messages of condolence.

 

The casket was then closed and driven to a nearby church.

 

Then there was a service at the church with a brief sermon by the minister and more family recollections. At the end, the casket was carried from the church to the gravesite. A final blessing by the minister, casting of flowers on the casket.

 

Then everyone went to a restaurant and ate a meal. In our case, the owner of the restaurant was a close friend of the deceased. It was the finest banquet I can remember. Thus we said goodbye to a friend, who was also a good man's wife, a beloved school teacher, and a retired missionary who once lived overseas while she helped translate the Bible into a language that had never before been written down. 

 

Sorry, I can't say any more. The pain is still there. Marie always stood behind us in church. That spot is empty now. Remember that.

Edited by paulchernoch
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13 hours ago, paulchernoch said:

Sorry, I can't say any more. The pain is still there. Marie always stood behind us in church. That spot is empty now. Remember that.

 

Paul, please forgive me for my seeming insensitivity to your loss. When I posted my last comment, my oops, it did become an oops. I did not see your comment. I'm so sorry for your loss. I pray the Lord comforts you with a special touch of His presence and peace.

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Wow, this is a far later response time than I planed! I'm soooo sorry! 

 

On 11/20/2020 at 4:06 PM, Ky_GirlatHeart said:

3. How long does a visitation last? Also, what's the setup before a visitation?

I'm not sure what a setup before visitation means. Usually, thought it can be different, there is a two hour window for visitation the night before the funeral, or if you are having them cremated, then the night before the memorial service. Family and friends come to this, but it's more about giving co-works, non-close friends, and others that are not super close to the deceased person a chance to say goodbye, and to give their condolences to the family. There might be prayers for the family, but that is typically all. 

On 11/20/2020 at 4:06 PM, Ky_GirlatHeart said:

1. How do Baptist burials and funerals work?

Mostly like everyone else. If you are going to the crematory you have the long funeral persuasion and then they hold the funeral itself. What the pastor will talk about entirely depends on who is saved, and who is not. If the whole family are Christians, than it will be a refection of the person's life, and all the ways God used them to touch others, and an encouragement for you to let God use you like this. If even one person might not be saved, they will talk about salvation. Sometimes fire and brimstone, sometimes the prodigal son. It just depends on the pastor and the people there. This can be 20 minutes, but I'm used to it taking at least 45 minutes, and have been there for a few hours before. Now if you are only having the memorial, because they are being cremated, or the body was lost at sea or something, it's the same thing, but either at the funeral home, or the church. Also to be noted, some pastors are known to refer people to others who will do the funeral if the deceased person was not only unsaved, but a not so good person. (I don't just mean their personality, i mean actively doing illegal things, or purposely hurting others.) If the family insisted they either say the person went to heaven, or they want only glowing talk about them even if they were a serial killer and yes, there are families like that. 

 

On 11/20/2020 at 4:06 PM, Ky_GirlatHeart said:

2. What normally happens after the funeral and burial? Do they have a sort-of thing where those who come to pay their respects and the family eat afterwards or something along those lines? (Again, I ask that because the first funeral I went to did that.)

The church holds a pot luck. I have never been to a baptist funeral where they did not have a potluck. Everyone that was at the funeral is invited to come eat afterward. Usually this is the time they start telling stories about the deceased person. What they did as kids growing up. That time they came to change a tire in the middle of a storm for the lady stranded on the side of the road. They tough me to fish. Those kinds of things. Usually you talk among whoever is at the table with you. As you leave you give you condolences to the family again. Some churches will send home food with the family, some will bring food in the next day or two, and others don't do that. 

 

I Hope that helps. 

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