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Johne

How To Write A Premise

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Katie Weiland asked for us to write a one sentence premise for our WIP, so I looked up how she does it:
https://www.helpingwritersbecomeauthors.com/find-overlooked-ingredient-successfully-marketing-book/

 

Quote

Clay awakens in the body of an 8' blue clay golem with no memory of who he used to be who reluctantly takes up a high profile missing person's case and defeat the powerful but evil Archmage in order to save the people of his adopted home.

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Frankie is transported to a realm of fantasy, where he is prophesized to destroy a demonic tyrant, and learns that prophecy, fate, and faith are not always as they seem.

 

 

 

Of course it's projected as 4 books at this point, so the "not always as they seem" covers a LOT of territory...

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My (unedited and decaffeinated) attempt:

 

When Morgan Callarah is attacked by a mysterious beast at her coming-of-age and the lives of those she loves are threatened, she must learn that her identity is not defined by the people around her but by the One Who Created her. 

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Posted (edited)

Harriet's diary traces her mule-drawn-covered-wagon journey to the Montana gold fields to find her father, but he is finally located by her great-ever-so-great granddaughter.

Edited by carolinamtne
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Posted (edited)

Thanks, SW. Now that I have a good premise, all I have to do is make the ones in the diary work.

Edited by carolinamtne
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"The prophet Jonah had nothing on the 21st-century anthropologist who finds himself in the bowels of a huge interstellar colony ship hurtling through space, populated by the descendants of political prisoners exiled from Earth!"

 

Is the exclamation point too much?

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You know, I'm beginning to feel left out- I don't write any premises for my books, I just write them.  I've never before even considered the idea.  Thanks, Johne, for giving me something new to think about!😀

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7 hours ago, EClayRowe said:

Is the exclamation point too much?

Personally, I would leave it out, but then, I wouldn't write about a

 

7 hours ago, EClayRowe said:

21st-century anthropologist who finds himself in the bowels of a huge interstellar colony ship hurtling through space

with or without political prisoners. But it sounds like a good book to read.

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6 hours ago, lynnmosher said:

To me, a premise is like an elevator pitch. Very short and to the point with a hook. ;)

 

That's a good description.

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Here's #1 of my two works in progress:

 

After Preen Ends receives a phone call from her supposedly dead husband, she sets out to find him and bring him home, hoping to make up for all the mistakes she's made.

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Here is the premise for my WIP (YA Fantasy), The Loyalty of Trolls:

 

Disguised as a hunk of moon rock, the millennia-old king of the trolls hitches a ride back to earth on Apollo 17, intent on rebuilding the architectural wonder that got him exiled there in the first place: the Tower of Babel.

 

Paul

Edited by paulchernoch

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A professional woman answers a dating ad posted by a paraplegic.  Between him and his robot double, she has her work cut out teaching them all what love looks like. 

 

A homeless drug dealer assumes responsibility for his newborn daughter. She brings him back into the love and support of his family. 

 

The queen of the fairies is ill and her husband and son are lost in the greater world trying to find a cure. Her successor must use all powers of diplomacy to get the natural world of muskrats and ducks to defeat the evil frog empire and win a cure and the return of the missing men. 

 

Leoshine's people kicked Arthur's people off their planet. Now he's back to save them from destruction, and her from moral degeneration, unless she saves him first. 

 

So many stories ... so little time. 

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Good thing I’m going to live until I’m 120!  Though the ideas keep coming.  By then I’ll be hiring ghost writers!  Ha ha.  Pun not intended, but appreciated anyway! 

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On 1/16/2020 at 8:54 AM, paulchernoch said:

intent on rebuilding the architectural wonder that got him exiled there in the first place: the Tower of Babel.

AH!!!! I like this!

 

Except I'm not sure about "exiled there." Was he excited to the moon? "back to earth" is the location closest to this. Perhaps "exiled from there"?

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