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Join Us For A Power Verb Exercise


lynnmosher

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9 minutes ago, zx1ninja said:

Ooo oooo How about this? 

 

The girl threw the ball at the robots head so forcefully that it bounced over the cliff.  The man watched the mayhem from the couch because he had no legs, forcing him to just sit there. The robot's gyro was damaged by the ball and it stumbled to the cliff hopelessly plunging off into the craggy rocks below.

 

LOL You guys are nuts! I love it! xD

 

Okay. Here's one example: made vs developed. Made is bland. Developed is a power verb. So, instead of threw, you might use heaved or pelted. See the difference? Also, if you use a great verb, you can get rid of most of the wases!

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1 hour ago, suspensewriter said:

Huh? - caveman like adverbs.  Shiny words.  Pretty words.

 

 

 

LOL I missed this! Yeah, I know! :P

 

3 minutes ago, Nicola said:

Why do we eliminate a whole category of grammar?   

 

Maria's nephew vanished into the plush cushions of her couch. In the apartment overhead the tenant thwacked a projectile, probably a rubber ball against the linoleum, over and over, until it sounded like a rusted robot had launched into oblivion and landed in the surf below a rocky cliff. 

 

LOL This is great, Nicola! :D

 

Got me on the eliminating thing, Nicola! However, like I said, sometimes you need them. But relying on those shiny words can become a bad habit of not trying for better verbs. The thesaurus should be your best friend. ;)

 

 

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Thank you for putting up with us Lynn. Thank you for trying to get us to think a little differently. 

 

 So how about this then. 

 

The girl blasted the ball at the robot, bashing it's head in. The man on the couch is forced to get up and get his own snack. He is so distraught that he pushes the robot to disintegrate on the rocks below the cliff. As the man removes himself from his power chair and sits down on the couch, he begins to bawl realizing he forgot to get a drink and the girl hates him for killing the robot. :D

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Okay. Here's from writingforward.com, which says...

 

Why are adverbs that end in -ly so awful? I’m glad you asked. Let’s take a look at an example sentence:

 

“Why don’t you come over here and sit by me?” she asked flirtatiously.

It’s a horrid sentence. The adverb flirtatiously tells the reader how she asked the question, when instead it should show how she asked:

“Why don’t you come over here and sit by me?” she asked, batting her eyelashes.

 

“The road to hell is paved with adverbs.” ~ Stephen King

 

Just thought I'd throw, ahum, catapult that out there! :D

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1 hour ago, lynnmosher said:

Why are adverbs that end in -ly so awful? I’m glad you asked. Let’s take a look at an example sentence:

 

“Why don’t you come over here and sit by me?” she asked flirtatiously.

It’s a horrid sentence. The adverb flirtatiously tells the reader how she asked the question, when instead it should show how she asked:

“Why don’t you come over here and sit by me?” she asked, batting her eyelashes.

 

Someone must stand up for adverbs.

 

First, according to the Atlantean scholar Plutorius, adverbs were invented since verbs are lame and hobble through sentences the way a pigeon walks on flypaper.  Verbs cannot, he said, stand alone for long or they simply fall over.

 

Second, it is a common tactic of members of the Secret Society of Anti-Adverbialists to use subversive examples of inappropriately employed adverbs as representations of all adverbs.  A similar tactic, Plutorius explained, would be to say that cars were better than airplanes for traveling long distances and to demonstrate this by comparing a revved up Ferrari to a one winged, out of fuel plane.  This tactic actually was employed by PT Barnum before one of his elephants trumpeted the truth to a noted journalist exposing the hoax.  To Barnum's great good fortune, the case was thrown out of court as the subsequent passing of peanuts was viewed by the court as a bribe, although to his dying day the elephant claimed it was not.  

 

And, before you ask, of course Atlanteans had cars and planes!

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4 minutes ago, lynnmosher said:

Okay. Let's attempt another set.

 

1) The flying saucer flew over.

2) The saloon was filled with drunken cowboys.

3) The nurse signed the patient in.

The cowboys shook in their boots as the flying suacer flew into view over the their drunken stupor. The light beam emitted by the flying saucer snatched three of the yellow belly fools up into the air. Fighting against air, one fell needing the nurse to sign him into the hospital for corrective surgery. 

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The cowboys quake in their boots as the flying suacer silently comes into view during the their drunken stupor. A light beam emitted by the flying saucer snatched three of the yellow belly fools from the trough of liqueur up into the air. Fighting against air, one fell needing a nurse to drag him into the hospital for corrective surgery. 

 

I also corrected the story.

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"Nurse Barnes!" cried the orderly wheeling a thrashing patient through ER.

"Hold that cowboy down!" Nurse Barnes flapped the clip board and chart at the Doctor.

"Shaauuuchers!" wailed the patient.  "I sheened dem in de air."  He crossed his eyes and circled both his head on his neck and his finger in front of his nose.

 

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5 minutes ago, Nicola said:

"Nurse Barnes!" cried the orderly wheeling a thrashing patient through ER.

"Hold that cowboy down!" Nurse Barnes flapped the clip board and chart at the Doctor.

"Shaauuuchers!" wailed the patient.  "I sheened dem in de air."  He crossed his eyes and circled both his head on his neck and his finger in front of his nose.

 

Yeeee haaa that's it

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1 hour ago, zx1ninja said:

The cowboys quake in their boots as the flying suacer silently comes into view during the their drunken stupor. A light beam emitted by the flying saucer snatched three of the yellow belly fools from the trough of liqueur up into the air. Fighting against air, one fell needing a nurse to drag him into the hospital for corrective surgery. 

 

I also corrected the story.

 

LOLOL I don't know when I've laughed so much! Actually, very good job, Z! :D

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42 minutes ago, Nicola said:

"Nurse Barnes!" cried the orderly wheeling a thrashing patient through ER.

"Hold that cowboy down!" Nurse Barnes flapped the clip board and chart at the Doctor.

"Shaauuuchers!" wailed the patient.  "I sheened dem in de air."  He crossed his eyes and circled both his head on his neck and his finger in front of his nose.

 

 

LOLOL Where do you get all this? So good! I'd love to see the inside of your head! And Z's and SW's! :D

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