Advice Needed on Consistency of Tenses

[christwriter]

Dear All @ CW Writers' Lounge

I hope this is the right forum to seek advice on writing.

I am very weak when it comes to keeping consistency of tenses in my writings, and I need expert help on this.

I am seeking advice on how I should write a story that starts off with the past, then acted out as if happening during the actual event, and then ending it with reflective writing of what we can learn from the story.

Based on this scenario, it is likely I will have to use past tense, present tense, past perfect, present continuous and possibly more. How should I, in this case, write the story without jeopardizing the consistency of tenses? When should I use 'have' instead of 'had' if there are overlapping time frames?

For example, if I write the first part of a story completely in past tense, then near the end of the story write a reflection on the lessons we can learn, how should the following paragraph be written correctly without inconsistency of tense?

Reflecting on the events, I realized how hard it must be for a person to say, "yet not as I will, but as You will." In some sense, I can now better comprehend what it means to ask for the cup to pass me by, but I cannot imagine how the Lord must have felt, with full knowledge of the cup He had to take, to still be willing to say, "yet not as I will, but as You will." What great pain He must have felt within His heart and how much He must have struggled in prayer while at the Garden of Gethsemane. It is no wonder in His agony, His sweat became like drops of blood (Luke 22:44).
Appreciate your advice. Thank you.

[paulchernoch]

The only advice I can offer is: lots of editing. I've been writing my trilogy for over four years, and last night (in the middle of my twelfth draft) I came across another section where the narrator used the wrong tense. (It wasn't MY fault, it was the narrator. :D Blame someone else.)

It is easier to find inconsistency when you read it than when you write it.

As for the points of reflection, as your story matures, those will be the parts you have to rewrite the most. It might be better to save them until the end, since the events you have to reflect on may change before you are done.

- Paul

[michaelsnyder]

CW,

Not sure I'll be that much help...but I'll try. Is this fiction, memoir, non-fiction, creative non-fiction, other?

You used the word 'story' a few times, which had me assuming we were dealing with fiction. However, the short excerpted passage reads more like non.

Regardless of your answer, my basic answer will be the same...keep it as simple as possible. If it's fiction, I think your life will be much easier if you pick a tense and do your best to stick with it. If some part of your story calls for a different tense, I would simply put a transitional line or two to set that up, then get in and out of the 'new tense' as quickly as possible. I'd rather risk giving the reader whiplash than having them put the book down out of confusion.

If the book is non-fiction, 2 things: a) I think the chapter breaks will afford you more flexibility with tenses and POV and things, and b) I really stink at non-fiction so don't listen to me!!!

Mike

[Michael Scott]

Just to throw a fun wrench into the works:

Whenever you're quoting tenses from the New Testament, bear in mind that tense in Greek does not refer to time of action, but rather to kind of action. Timing is incidental.

It makes for some rough translation work, but it might give you a little flexibility in how you utilize specific verses.

[lynnmosher]

[INDENT]Reflecting on the events, I realized how hard it must be for a person to say, "yet not as I will, but as You will." In some sense, I can now better comprehend what it means to ask for the cup to pass me by, but I cannot imagine how the Lord must have felt, with full knowledge of the cup He had to take, to still be willing to say, "yet not as I will, but as You will." What great pain He must have felt within His heart and how much He must have struggled in prayer while at the Garden of Gethsemane. It is no wonder in His agony, His sweat became like drops of blood (Luke 22:44).

The only suggestion I have for this paragraph is in the first sentence. I would state it this way...

Reflecting on the events, I realize how hard it must be...

Hope this helps a little.

[christwriter]

Thank you all for your valuable feedback.

The above example of a 'reflective' story is for a non-fiction article, although my query is essentially for both fiction and non-fiction for different articles. I tend to use the word 'story' to mean either fiction or non-fiction, being accustomed to the use of news 'story' for factual reporting.

I do not normally write fiction, so when I made my first attempt recently in retelling the story of Balaam from the POV of the donkey, the general feedback from readers was that I have lots of inconsistent tenses, but none of them provided me with the specifics where I went wrong in the article, which is the reason I am seeking help here.

Appreciate all your help.

Regards

[Tarin]

Perhaps you'd be able to get more specific feedback if you posted your story in one of the Workshops (http://christianwriters.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=72)?