PrettyPixels
12-30-2007, 09:26 PM
No doubt about it--single parenting is tough! I'm curious to know what each of finds is the most difficult aspect of single parenting.
For me, it's two things. First, the lonliness. It's so hard not having a partner to support and reassure you. Parenting was meant to be a team effort, and when one partner isn't there... well, it's very difficult. It's so much easier to have another parent that cherishes and supports your children the same as you do. I think it's a mixture of security, and wanting the best for your kids (as we all do).
I also struggle with feelings of being cheated. The breakup of my marriage was exclusively my ex's fault--he decided that for him, marriage didn't mean monogamy. He led an adulterous double life for years until I found out, and remains unrepentant to this day. While I love my friends and would never begrudge their happiness, it makes my heart ache to see their perfect, intact families and perfect lives. I do feel cheated--my children and I didn't deserve this backstabbing and heartbreak from their father. And as all parents know, seeing your kids hurting breaks a parents' heart more than anything else.
I do try to keep my head up, and don't dwell on the negative. I've moved on, and am making a new life for my children and I. Still sometimes speaking about your pain with others (who have been there) is very healing.
So, my question again: what do you feel is the most challenging aspect (or aspects) of being a single parent?
For me, it's two things. First, the lonliness. It's so hard not having a partner to support and reassure you. Parenting was meant to be a team effort, and when one partner isn't there... well, it's very difficult. It's so much easier to have another parent that cherishes and supports your children the same as you do. I think it's a mixture of security, and wanting the best for your kids (as we all do).
I also struggle with feelings of being cheated. The breakup of my marriage was exclusively my ex's fault--he decided that for him, marriage didn't mean monogamy. He led an adulterous double life for years until I found out, and remains unrepentant to this day. While I love my friends and would never begrudge their happiness, it makes my heart ache to see their perfect, intact families and perfect lives. I do feel cheated--my children and I didn't deserve this backstabbing and heartbreak from their father. And as all parents know, seeing your kids hurting breaks a parents' heart more than anything else.
I do try to keep my head up, and don't dwell on the negative. I've moved on, and am making a new life for my children and I. Still sometimes speaking about your pain with others (who have been there) is very healing.
So, my question again: what do you feel is the most challenging aspect (or aspects) of being a single parent?