josc008
09-02-2007, 09:06 PM
Forgiveness: Is it real?
"The old life is gone; a new life burgeons! Look at it! All this comes from the God who settled the relationship between us and him, and then called us to settle our relationships with each other. God put the world square with himself through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by offering forgiveness of sins." 2 Co 5:17-19. (MSG)
I've been through a lot and I have had to come to a point in my life that in order to go on living as a follower of Jesus Christ I have to forgive. Which got me thinking. When is forgiveness real?
I had no problem saying that I forgave someone that hurt me. In fact it was expected of my in my pastoral role. I had to claim forgiveness, otherwise I was a fake. I ended up faking out myself. I walked around thinking how super spiritual I was for forgiving those who had hurt me, in fact I even brought it up in conversations about forgiveness. I used myself as an example, all the while harboring junk in my heart, not willing to deal with the cancer that was eating me from the inside.
Have you ever heard the phrase "I forgive him but that doesn't mean I have to trust him ever again."? I think that is a load of CRAP! We have it in our minds that this thing called forgiveness is a human invention, something we do by shear will power. We have forgotten what forgiveness is really all about and who actually authored such an abrasive concept.
Forgiveness is the result of the love of God sweeping into our lives and causing us to find true meaning in a life lived for the One who loved us first, unconditionally. Forgiveness is about relationship. That is the whole purpose, the point, the head, the big idea, the number one thing (Need I go on?)! Without Jesus Christ dying on the cross to pay my debt and forgiving me, a relationship with God (who created me, loves me, and has a plan for me) would not be available! That's the ultimate example of forgiveness.
So how does that boil down to our lives? It's easy to say: "I forgive him but I don't want anything to do with him" or "I forgive her, now that she is out of my life" or even "I forgive him but I'll never trust him again". Sadly that is not forgiveness. You can't actually forgive someone without desiring relationship. Forgiveness doesn't create space between you and that person. It doesn't raise you to a morally superior position. It doesn't separate.
Real forgiveness is born out of unconditional love. It involves a desire to take a broken relationship and make it whole. It flows from an all powerful God who knows that we are weak and need His help to truly forgive those that hurt us. It's God who makes it possible to live without the pain those hurts have caused. His healing touch can close those wounds that seem so permanent, the wounds buried deep down in our souls that affect how we relate, how we love, and trust.
So when is forgiveness real? When the name of the person who hurt you doesn't cause your stomach to clench. When the thought or mention of the incident doesn't cause anger to well up in you. When you can relive the incident through sharing it with others and legitimately tell how God has not only helped you to forgive but also changed you heart towards the person who hurt you. When you can look that person in the eye, shake their hand and not have your relationship hindered by the past.
This can happen to you; forgiveness that causes you to forgive, unconditional love that causes you to love unconditionally, relationship restored that causes you to restore relationships. Talk to God, share with Him your hurts, lay them at His feet and ask Him to start a work in you to forgive those that have hurt you. It's the power of Jesus' blood that makes forgiveness possible and that power is extraordinary!
"The old life is gone; a new life burgeons! Look at it! All this comes from the God who settled the relationship between us and him, and then called us to settle our relationships with each other. God put the world square with himself through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by offering forgiveness of sins." 2 Co 5:17-19. (MSG)
I've been through a lot and I have had to come to a point in my life that in order to go on living as a follower of Jesus Christ I have to forgive. Which got me thinking. When is forgiveness real?
I had no problem saying that I forgave someone that hurt me. In fact it was expected of my in my pastoral role. I had to claim forgiveness, otherwise I was a fake. I ended up faking out myself. I walked around thinking how super spiritual I was for forgiving those who had hurt me, in fact I even brought it up in conversations about forgiveness. I used myself as an example, all the while harboring junk in my heart, not willing to deal with the cancer that was eating me from the inside.
Have you ever heard the phrase "I forgive him but that doesn't mean I have to trust him ever again."? I think that is a load of CRAP! We have it in our minds that this thing called forgiveness is a human invention, something we do by shear will power. We have forgotten what forgiveness is really all about and who actually authored such an abrasive concept.
Forgiveness is the result of the love of God sweeping into our lives and causing us to find true meaning in a life lived for the One who loved us first, unconditionally. Forgiveness is about relationship. That is the whole purpose, the point, the head, the big idea, the number one thing (Need I go on?)! Without Jesus Christ dying on the cross to pay my debt and forgiving me, a relationship with God (who created me, loves me, and has a plan for me) would not be available! That's the ultimate example of forgiveness.
So how does that boil down to our lives? It's easy to say: "I forgive him but I don't want anything to do with him" or "I forgive her, now that she is out of my life" or even "I forgive him but I'll never trust him again". Sadly that is not forgiveness. You can't actually forgive someone without desiring relationship. Forgiveness doesn't create space between you and that person. It doesn't raise you to a morally superior position. It doesn't separate.
Real forgiveness is born out of unconditional love. It involves a desire to take a broken relationship and make it whole. It flows from an all powerful God who knows that we are weak and need His help to truly forgive those that hurt us. It's God who makes it possible to live without the pain those hurts have caused. His healing touch can close those wounds that seem so permanent, the wounds buried deep down in our souls that affect how we relate, how we love, and trust.
So when is forgiveness real? When the name of the person who hurt you doesn't cause your stomach to clench. When the thought or mention of the incident doesn't cause anger to well up in you. When you can relive the incident through sharing it with others and legitimately tell how God has not only helped you to forgive but also changed you heart towards the person who hurt you. When you can look that person in the eye, shake their hand and not have your relationship hindered by the past.
This can happen to you; forgiveness that causes you to forgive, unconditional love that causes you to love unconditionally, relationship restored that causes you to restore relationships. Talk to God, share with Him your hurts, lay them at His feet and ask Him to start a work in you to forgive those that have hurt you. It's the power of Jesus' blood that makes forgiveness possible and that power is extraordinary!